woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do... and then you need to delete the history so you're girlfriend doesn't see it.
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