there's paper in my vomit.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
Randomize
