i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize
