how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
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