Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
Randomize