girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize