Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
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