Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
PANTIES FOUND
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