He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
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