Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
Pissing into the Grand Canyon is the single most liberating thing I've ever done in my entire life
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
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