I looked at my own cervix.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
There are some things you can ever unsee. And walking in on your dad jerking off is one of those things.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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