Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize