So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
I have bruises all over from falling so much last night, I even have bruises on my arms from them picking me up off the street.. Oh vodka nights.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
My Sundays are fucking awful. Can't get a blow job.....can't get a win.
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
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