you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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