Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
I wanted to say "you're a souless cunt" but in a nice way. So I added a smiley face.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
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