If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
