I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize