Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Some guy at the bar last night bought us Arrowhead water and I was so drunk, it tasted good
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize
