It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
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my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
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No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?