Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
I'm not drunk enough to eat silly string
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
