ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
My sex life reached a new low tonight: we stopped into this bar so I could pee and when I got out of the bathroom my parents had ordered a round for us and this traveling nurse they met and were trying to run game for me. Saddest part? She was actually going for it.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize
