Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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