The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
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