we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
one two three fourrrrnication!
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
