I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I understand Curling. That high.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
Randomize
