Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
Just got discharged from the hospital after getting my finger stitched back together don't you dare say you had a worse night than me
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I am available for nakedness
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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