By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize
