But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Found moms dildo in drawer while looking for socks, and its wet
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
Fun holiday story for you: Alex and I went out drinking. She left. I needed a ride home. Met this dude and told him to drive my car back. Once at my house, I made him take out my dog and then apologized for not wanting to make out with him. I said, let me go see if my roommate is interested and then I slept in Alex's bed all night.
20 bucks says he was an actual leprechaun
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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