its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We should make a goal to do one active thing a day, even if its like throwing a ball
And by ball i mean playing catch. Beer pong does not count as an activity
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
