WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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