I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
You spent about half an hour trying to convince me that mesh condoms were a good idea.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
Randomize