Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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