My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
We already gave up cheese, how are we supposed to give up coke?
Randomize
