Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize