The party tonight has no theme but I decided to go as a home wrecker.
and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
after we had sex last night he told me he smelled like my vagina. and then he said that if his roommate had a vagina he would probably smell like it. because "they hug weird and shit."
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
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Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
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I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
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