Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
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