You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
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