Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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