just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
