I accidentally had phone sex last night
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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