okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
You spent like 10 minutes trying to hit a golf ball that was actually a cigarette butt. And then fell over.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
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