Your last words were "i'm gonna motorboat the bartender." then you commenced with an attempted motorboat
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
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