Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
Randomize
