question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
