I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
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Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
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He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Are you okay? You're not sitting at home on facebook. I'm worried about you.
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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