Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
Randomize