Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I hope you have your own chainsaw cause I didn’t buy one for you. It was a gross oversight on my part
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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