remember when she hit me with her car by accident, well apparently it wasn't an accident.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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