All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
I see more hoeing in ur future
Randomize