last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
you never un-have a 4some
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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